As women we put up with a number of things. There is water retention, where our ankles swell up to the size of balloons and fingers closely resemble sausages. Our monthly period – with or without cramps (sorry for bringing that one up fella’s). And for me the most embarrassing – facial hair.
I have polycystic ovarian syndrome and one of the symptoms of this is an excessive amount of body hair. I have been removing it from my chin and neck for the last fifteen years with varying degrees of success. There is waxing, cream, shaving, epilation, plucking…
For some reason though, I didn’t get hair on my top lip….. until about three years ago. It was one morning when I was peering closely in the mirror (after removing my contact lenses I had no choice but to peer closely) and who was staring back at me? It was only Tom Selleck!!!!!! It seemed overnight I had grown a moustache good enough to rival any seventies porn star. Yeah, yeah a slight exaggeration, but that was how it felt.
To a symphony of “ouch” “bugger” “DAMN” and a few others I will not repeat (yes one did rhyme with pluck) I removed the offending half a dozen or so hairs with a pair of tweezers. Unfortunately, as you can guess they came back and brought friends with them!
I do wonder what I would look like if I didn’t fluff, buff, pluck and tweeze each day. Maybe a beard would grow enough to rival a pal of mine from the playgroup school run. Or I could find a travelling show and become the amazing bearded, moustached lady. At the very least I should hear chica, chica, waa, waa whenever I enter a room.